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Chapter VI
Beware of Thieves

 

Not long ago, on "Separación" street in the commercial sector of Puerto Plata, I was almost attacked. It was about 3 o'clock in the afternoon; I walked quietly, casually carrying a small, white envelope. Without suspecting a second, that this envelope full of utility bills could ignite the greed of strong-arm robbers and pickpockets, I strolled calmly while watching with a distracted eye the beautiful old houses in town.

Suddenly, a young motorcyclist who obviously thought that my envelope contained money, abruptly stopped, got off his vehicle and greeted me with a loud and discourteous "Oye". I froze, and, suspiciously, I looked him straight in the eye. While he was staring at my envelope trying to guess the contents, the man asked me with a gravelly voice:

- Señor, do you know where the office of the Revolutionary Party is?

Unfortunately, the street was almost deserted, and this guy had the opportunity to put his hands on my envelope, or to steal my wallet, regardless of the few people who could see him.

Quickly, I took an air of circumstance, and I replied in a voice four times as clamorous as his loudmouth:

- No, no and no! I do not know! Ask someone else!

With my bushy beard and my intentionally murderous eyes, my clamor produced the desired effect. The scoundrel ran towards his bike, mounted, and rode away without waiting for the rest.

I will bet you anything that this frustrated thug had taken me for a homicidal psychopath, recently escaped from a psychiatric hospital.

I take this opportunity to recommend to the inhabitants of Puerto Plata to be highly vigilant. As recently as last week, while standing in line to pay a utility bill, I saw someone get out of his pocket a wad of banknotes that, in all candor, he began to count. I do not know if this foolish man wanted to impress his fellow patrons, or to figure out his expenses. In any case, I am sure that this careless man had committed a monumental blunder, by informing all those who watched him lugging such a comfortable sum in his pocket.

This reckless and aberrant attitude could cause a lot of problems. A witness to this grotesque display could have attacked the misguided owner of this money in a deserted street and extort all of his assets.

In summary, whenever possible, we should not tempt thieves. Sometimes, we do not realize that it is us who encourage their next move by openly flashing too much money in front of their greedy eyes. In this regard, I noted that most cashiers in Puerto Plata believe themselves invincible and unassailable, perhaps because of the protective presence of an armed security guard standing a few feet away from their register.

Often with complete nonchalance, these cashiers balance their cash register till, under the watchful eyes of customers. They have before them a stack of pesos that they handle peacefully. They seem to forget that an open door may tempt a saint. The ludicrous spectacle of crunching all these bills can provide extremely daring ideas to an unemployed youth in despair, for example. The young man, spurred by the prospect of an immediate gain, may return with fellow offenders. As it has already been seen more than once, these bandits will not hesitate to kill the security guard before taking action. A security officer's protection is somewhat incomplete or merely an illusion.

Before concluding this chapter, I want to talk briefly about a group of thieves that I have just discovered: Hosptal Rats. This clever breed enters the hospital rooms, under the false pretext of inquiring about the status of patients. Very often, they come upon on one or two sleep stricken people. Relatives or friends who keep hospital patients company often succumb to boredom and fatigue, and sleep soundly. The only thing left to do is to round up calmly handbags lying on a chair or nightstand.

 

English Translation By Vadim Dambreville

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