Girlfriend.Girlfriends.I already dislike them.

I have 2 handsome boys.

And I know they will break my heart one day.

It is a dilemma I acknowledge.

As much as I want them to grow up to be fine young gentlemen and learn to treat ladies with due respect and love a woman single heartedly; deep down in my heart – I know I will be green with jealousy when that day arrives. Can I say I already dislike all my sons’ future girlfriends? hahahaaa….. (*evil laugh*)

Or rather the protective mother hen emerge! How can you blame mothers? Mothers have this instinct to perhaps, over-protect, over-nag, over-suspicious and over-emotional. I still remembered the first time I met my now in-laws some 16 years back. 🙂 Mothers are often the ones who will want to continue the “mothering” of their “Mama’s boy” and leaving Fathers to take on a protective shield over their precious “Daddies’ girls”.

I have 2 charming boys.

And I know they will charm some (good) girls one day.

And I am seeing it now!

There is this cutesy fair girl from school who bears the name “Olivia” – the name of the character of this series of books he was reading last year. Xi En announced to me after a few days of school that he likes Olivia. I am not sure if it’s the name or the person. 😀

There is this tall and strong girl in the neighbourhood whom he enjoys following around. Superwoman is fun to be with! 😀

Superwoman

And there is this pretty Australian girl in a colorful tutu dress whose hands he held on so endearingly throughout our stroll in the Melbourne city. My college friend’s daughter! He proudly counted “E” as one of his friends when he tallied his “friends count”. 😀

It is heartening to see that Xi En is friendly to (most) girls and treat them nicely. And I am glad he’s in the “right orientation”. Heheheh.

I know one day I won’t be the only one who can wipe his tears when he fall, bring a smile to his face with smothering kisses and welcome him home with a bear hug.

Be still, mommy’s heart. We have some years to go before his heart includes another woman besides his Mommy! Till then, I will do my best to bring up fine young men. You are most welcomed, my dear future daughter-in-laws. 🙂

Happy Friday and weekend to come everyone!

P.S: Do you have a son too? Like me, do you watch his growing up with lots of pride and some butterflies in the stomach too? 🙂

The Real; The Fake; The Ups and The Low-downs

I believe this is a stage that most bloggers will encounter. More so if you are blogging about your young children. You start questioning if your blog is 1) relevant; 2) too fake; too impersonal; 3) too real; too dangerous.

I have been blogging since 2009; on and off but more regularly so during the last 2 years when I joined the Singapore Mom Bloggers (SMB) group. My interest in blogging was piqued by my cousin who had a blog and shared interesting motherhood and education details about her daughter. I was facing an extremely difficult first pregnancy then and besides my hubby (and God); no one else seemed to be able to understand what we were going through. I started the blog partly out of boredom (being confined to bed rest) and a desire to find an outlet to express my thoughts. 5 years ago, the usage of smart phones weren’t as rampant as now and thus the idea of social media platforms were not as widely utilised too. Blogs were more “in” then. 🙂

Fast forward 5 years on, this blog had documented another challenging 2nd pregnancy and another miraculous birth of my 2nd boy. I am also blessed with opportunities to review products/attend events especially after joining SMB. One of my colleagues asked me if I am a “semi-famous blogger”! haaa.. I like that honesty. I am not famous; let alone “semi-famous” just because of advertorial activities. The aim of this blog had never changed and it is to provide an avenue of encouragement, empathy and sharing with mummies who might be going through difficult pregnancies; especially with PPROM conditions. It is a quiet objective working its way in a few moms-to-be lives which I had came across these 5 years. PPROM is a condition not commonly encountered in the Asia region and thus support is less available. I have women contacting me via my blog/emails to share about their predicament and we try to share notes and encouragement through the cyberspace. I have never met most of these women; but my heart ache every single time I received an email searching for answers and help. I was in their shoes before and I know it takes another who went through it to cry, to feel and to pray with them. The emotional struggles often outweigh the physical discomfort. Majority of these babies made it to preterm births; but yes, there are those who did not. There is no nicer way to put this; except it’s the truth. Whenever one such lady lost contact with me, I won’t pursue the contact either; because I know they need time and my experiences might not be relevant anymore. Times like this made me hug my boys tighter; give them extra kisses because I know they are miracles in our lives which we are extremely thankful for.

Dr Seuss

Putting the tears aside, this blog had seen happy times too! The many milestones my boys went through; their funny antics and our growing journey with them. Sometimes I am worried about the danger of putting them too much in the dangerous world of internet crimes. Hmmm…. too much concerns might lead to no action. But I try to practise some safety measures; e.g. sometimes an instagram photo is from yesterday and not where we are exactly at that moment. Unless there is requirement to blog/share from immediate locations, I try not to do so till we are almost leaving the place or already left.

There had been a series of blogs in the blogging sphere discussing about the “real life” behind the smiley faces in blogs. I asked my hubby this question just a few days back: “Is my blogging persona similar to my real-life persona?” Without any hesitation, he said “No; you are quite different in both lives”. *Ouch* Though I know to a certain extent I am different in “reel life” vs “real life”, to hear it said in your face, it is like a slap on your face huh? But the smarter hubby went on to elaborate (and maybe do some damage control!) that most, if not all bloggers will only share certain portions of their lives; not every single details. Most will share only areas which they are comfortable in sharing. For example, my hubby is an extremely private person and in respect for that, I choose not to share (too much) of him and us on the blog or social media. Sometimes (teasingly of course) I used it as threats towards him if he said or do something unkind to me or the situation. “That which you said is going on Facebook!” hahhaa.. For the records, It worked as a tease but not on quarrels-mode. 😛

The “chameleon nature” of a woman; don’t ruff her feathers! hehehe.

Gif of me

The smarter hubby also shared that many messages are similar/the same. It’s the way it is presented that will attract attention, readership and support. For example during the U.S. election, Obama and Mccain both wanted the same thing for U.S. But if you listen to both men’s speeches, one cannot deny that Obama is much more engaging and captivating vs a boring; pragmatic Mccain. That’s the power of charisma in my opinion. No one wants to listen to a boring speech; likewise on one likes to read boring blogs just sharing run-of-the-mill stories. And that’s how “unreality” sometimes set in. My life is not that interesting; just a mommy running after 2 boys and trying to juggle a work-family-life balance. But what make it interesting is the experiences I went through while finding a foothold in that balance beam. It is not that rosy pictures always; but I prefer to send across messages of hope, peace and life rather than chaos and doomsday. Just like most mommies, I face struggles and challenges in marriage, society, bringing children, extended family relations, church-life and more. But to publicly put those struggles on the blog is something I still struggle with today. Till my “smarter” hubby reminded me that no matter how “real” a blogger looks like on a blog, there are private things/moments which one does not readily want to share and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Sometimes, the blogging/social media persona might be a way to hide the real person. I have met bloggers whom I thought are “atas”; proud and inconsiderate of others’ feelings but in real person, they are just harmless commoners like me and you who might just need a little assurance or security. Similarly, I met those who I thought are “colourful” and full of ideas on their blogs, but in real person, they look so cold and unapproachable. :S

But then again, many people’s first impression of me is that I look conceited and is a proud person (at least my one person thinks that way: my hubby!). But give me a chance lah; most whom I count as close friends will know that I warm up easily after the ice is broken and you might not be able to stop me from yakking (and gesticulating) nonstop!

This is part of a musing going through my restless mind; nothing super concrete. Just part of me trying to refocus on objective of blogging; this blog and trying to brush up on my writing skills too. If you happened to bump into us on the street, please do say Hi or a virtual “hi” is very welcomed too. 🙂 I promise a smile and a handshake ok! Encouragement works both ways ya; bloggers need some little dosages of it too! 🙂 

Balance

Mummy. Mommy.Mom. Mum. Mother.

I goggled the definition of “Mummy” and this came out from Merriam-Webster  dictionary:

1. a: a body embalmed or treated for burial with preservatives in the manner of the ancient Egyptians.

b: a body unusually well preserved

Eekkss…. Not quite what I am looking for! Maybe I should stop using “Mummy” as a term for “Mother”.

“Mother” is more right.

From the Free Dictionary.com: A Noun (A Female Parent). An origin (eg. mother of invention). An adjective (Mother love). A Verb (Mothered; mothering).

Not going through an English lesson here. I did badly in that in school.

Mummy or Mum or Ma Ma or Mom is such an endearing term when you are a first-time Mom. Actually even if you are a multi-time Mom, it is always so heart-warming when your baby first utter that sweet word.

I can just melt like an ice-cream when Xi En first called me Mom.

Eizac: He’s really the baby in the house. His first word came a little later than his brother. And no, for the records, it is not Mummy, not Daddy.

You guessed rightly? It is “Kor Kor” (it means “older brother” in our dialect). The bigger brother didn’t think of it as any big deal but “Kor Kor” must be some kind of hero in the little brother’s eyes that he “recognised” him first.

Not in any kind of race game here; but again for records; the next word Eizac uttered when he was around 15th month is “MOMMY”! Yeah! “MUM—–MMMYYYY”! It started with a shy note of “Ma” and then “Mum-mi” and then now….. it is a full blown, loud with gusto “MOMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYY”!

And suddenly, coming to 18th month soon, Eizac thinks that endearing term is a punctuation, a conjunction, a verb, an adj; it is anything.

The moment he wakes up: 1st word: Mommy

When he wants milk: Mommy (besides “meh meh” – it means “milk milk”)

When he has a nightmare: Mommy!!!

When he fell down: MOOOOOOMMMMyyy (with tears and mucus)

When he couldn’t find the right puzzle piece: Mommy!

When he saw the plate of fruits on the table (and wanna eat): Mommmmmmmy!

And even when I am not at home or somewhere else in the house; he addresses everyone as “Mommy”. From the helper to his grandmother to his Daddy (Except “Kor Kor” because Xi En is in one special category in his mind I think).

It isn’t that he doesn’t know how to call “Po Po”, “Auntie” or “Daddy”. He knows and says them well too.

It is just that “MOMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYY” seemed to be a plural form for anything and everything. It is a punctuation, a coma and a full-stop.

It is cute somehow sometimes (till he gets clingy). I am not complaining (much).

I am enjoying that stage of “Mommy-in-the-first-place-in-my-heart” stage till it fades off. Smile